May 26, 2015

Our Newborn Schedule

Ha! Yeah right! Newborns don't have schedules.

They just do whatever their little brains tell them to do whenever they tell them to do it. Even if it's crying because all your needs are met and you are neither under or over stimulated. AKA nothing is wrong! Silly babies.

My maternity leave is rapidly approaching its end, and I am trying to wrap my head around getting back to the world of adults. For the past few months we have been going with the flow and rolling with the punches (insert various other cliches here).

Since we have been doing baby led breastfeeding, Hazel's hunger basically dictates our day. She eats approximately every 2-3 hours during the day. In between nursing sessions, we go through diaper changes and play sessions. Sometimes she naps. In the rare time when she's napping and she's not in my arms, I go through mad spurts of productivity like doing dishes and washing baby clothes and diapers (I still ignore my own laundry). Other times when she's napping IN my arms, we have Netflix marathons. We are currently rewatching the whole Gilmore Girls series.

It's a good day when I get my teeth brushed by dinner. I'm really on top of my game if I get them brushed by lunch! Suddenly, my personal hygiene is on the back burner to Hazel's every coo and smile.

Some days we are ambitious and we just pack up and leave the house. We go shopping or go out to lunch with family. Hazel has been great when we're out and about. We are comfortable nursing in the car between stores, and diaper changes on the seat of the car are frequent too. She loves the stimulation from the new environments and I think the white noise of restaurants is like a personal concert for her. She loves it!

Sometimes we're sleep deprived. Sometimes we don't leave the couch. Sometimes poop gets everywhere. Hazel's needs always end up coming before my own needs. We always make it through the day, and usually we are still smiling.

Now we're trying to make a new routine to prepare for my return to work. So far it includes building a stash of frozen breast milk and me thinking about getting out of bed after Hazel's 5 o'clockish feeding in order to practice getting ready for work as well as getting Hazel ready for her day. So far it hasn't happened. And I have no idea how I am going to accomplish nursing Hazel, showering, getting ready for work, pumping, packing Hazel's bag for the day, washing and packing my pump, I should also start packing my lunch since I'll be visiting Hazel on my lunch break... I'm not sure how it's all going to happen.

I'm also not sure about how I will be able to drop her off with almost complete strangers to take care of her all day while I'm a work. I've never been away from Hazel for more than 3 or 4 hours and that has only been once. Yes, I've met her teachers and they're all very nice, and the socialization is going to be great for her, but they're not me and they're not Tyler. They are the ones who are going to get to see her smiles (and her tears) all day long, and I'm going to be missing her terribly!

We've only been coexisting for a couple months, but she shared my body for 9-10 months before that, and she's been a piece of my heart since forever. Leaving her to someone else's care will be hard, BUT I'm still her only Momma and in the words of Carole King...

Wanting you the way I do
I only want to be with you
And I would go to the ends of the earth
'Cause, darling, to me that's what you're worth

Where you lead, I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, you need me to be with you
I will follow where you lead

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